Asking For Money

IMG_3146Hello There,

Imagine this: You feel amazing. Your hair, your clothes, your shoes all feel amazing.

You are about to go and meet a new potential VIP client who is not going to argue over price, and just cannot wait to work with you. She is ready to receive your work fully. She wants to do the work.

It is a full body yes on both sides. You just know it is going to be a great conversation, and that the two of you are going to create something incredible together. This woman’s life is going to change as a result and that feels incredibly nourishing to you.

What if that was your experience almost every single working day of your life? How it would it feel?

You would be living your purpose.

What if living your calling is about changing your mindset as much as it is about getting the practical side of your business in line? What if it is really mostly about finding the part of you that CAN DO THIS every single day?

Many of the women I work with tell me that they have a lot of anxiety about making big decisions alone, stress around the topic of money, and they do not know how to tap into their authentic style of leadership.

And they really want to live a joyful life doing what they love.

Yet changing your mindset around the idea of starting your own business, or being in business for yourself can seem challenging, even daunting.

I remember when I was first in business for myself, back in 2001 when I started working as a freelance journalist. I had been a full time financial journalist for years, working for companies like The Wall Street Journal’s Dow Jones News, and Australian Associated Press in Sydney. I had had my news stories published in every newspaper in Australia. I had had the experience of being the one to break world news about one of Australia’s top 500 companies.

Yet when it came to calling up editors and asking for work I was terrified. Calling stock brokers and analysts to get hot news tips is certainly intense, but nothing compared to being a freelancer calling the editors. Then once I got the job and I had to call the accounts departments to ask when the very much needed check would come through, I was even frozen with fear at times.

Back then the only way through the fear was to do it. I just kept going back to the phone, picking it up, and asking for work. And the only thing that made me do it, was that I really needed the work very badly to pay my bills. That and a very very strong stubborn streak that meant I just could not give up.

However, when I started a business in New York – Vital Switch – with my business partner Matteus Levell, it was different. I was giving private one-to-one sessions to American clients and I had to negotiate for payment in very intimate settings. People’s stuff about money comes up easily in these settings, which was intimidating for me at first.

The book The Soul of Money by Lynne Twist starts out with a great quote about how we are so often unconsciously driven by our emotional relationship to money:

Money is like an iron ring we put through our nose. It is now leading us around wherever it wants. We just forget that we are the ones who designed it.”– Mark Kinney.

When I had to negotiate for my payment with my private clients, my money stuff came up. The fear of asking for something that I really needed was there again.

This time though, it was different because I had support. My business partner helped me through it. He coached me around the energy of receiving.

It was amazing, because as soon as I started to put my focus on the heart opening of receiving instead of the fear of asking, the money started to come in. A lot of my stress dropped away.

The attitudes around money and the beliefs that hold them in place are often very deep. They may be something that we can understand with our ordinary mind, but in fact the anchors that hold them in place are often deep in the unconscious mind.

If you want to change them there are two things that need to happen – first you have to get into action and do things that go against the limiting beliefs and shake up your attitudes. And second, you need to see the real source.

Seeing the real source of your beliefs means seeing where they actually came from in the first place. When you really see it from deep inside, something shifts. There is a knowing, a sense of clarity and your whole Being can start to change the attitudes that may have been holding you back.

I have one client who is very successful in her business, (six figures) and she wants to go to the next level. The thing is that there are times when she is hit by big waves of anxiety. She is a successful person, and very capable and solid in general. But these waves come through her life quite regularly and at those times she becomes incredibly anxious about money, often overspends, and tends to create long impossible to-do lists.

When we worked together, it became clear that if she did not act on the anxiety by spending and creating impossible to-do lists, then she realized that she had big feelings underneath the fear that were previously only unconscious.

There were feelings of deep grief, loss, and a fear of abandonment in her heart. When we worked on opening this in the sessions, allowing her to feel her sense of self in a deep and connected way through the pain, she changed. She became more still, more calm and more peaceful. Through that experience, she also found a sense of certainty about what decisions to make and how to move forward in her business in a way that was supportive and felt good to her. She went to the next level.

I am so happy and grateful to work with women in this way. It is a true joy to see the women in my life stand up and shine their highest sense of self and achieve success in their businesses.

To learn more about my program “Start the business you love” please come to my FREE EVENT in Berkeley on Tuesday November 17th at 6pm – 8.30pm at the WeWork building.

If you cannot come to the event and you are interested in hearing more about what I do, or you want to connect, sign up here and we can set up a complementary one hour free of charge to see what is the next best step for you.

Wishing you all the abundance of deep connected joy,


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